Friday, May 29

hi i'm from teh internet

too many internet things going on. don't think I'm gonna use this much any more. follow me on these sites instead plz:

and occasionally maybe here:

god it's great to be alive
takes the skin right off my hide
to think I'll have to give it all up someday

Monday, May 25

so I'm into a bunch of this internet stuff now


and other things that start with t...

Sunday, May 24

I dreamt

I dreamt that I saw n'sync live and Justin Timberlake signed my chest. my new goal in life is to get someone famous sign my chest.

Wednesday, May 20

Saturday, May 16


about a month ago there was a weekend when Dr Dog, The Black Keys, and The Fleet Foxes were all playing in the same weekend, and I had to choose. I went to Dr Dog which was amamamazing, but it was still sad I didn't get to see the other two. I'm still dying for them to come around again. this weekend M Ward is playing tonight, and Ben Folds is playing tomorrow night. I like Ben Folds alright, and I know he puts on an incredible live show, but I bought an M Ward ticket because he's one of my new favorite things, I saw him with Zooey Deschanel as She and Him and he was just great (and sexy!), and I really want to see his solo stuff now, I've just gotten into it. yesterday I got an email from this newsletter I get but don't really read. last week I saw they had a contest for free M Ward and Ben Folds tickets, and so I just entered my name and email. well turns out I won! a free Ben Folds ticket! soooooo perfect! I'M SO EXCITED!!!

let's dance
put on your read shoes and dance the blues

Friday, May 15

young and shitty

I really love that my life is so young and shitty right now. when you're older, you have to have nice things, but for now I'm just so happy being poor. I can wear whatever I want, it doesn't matter how ripped up or stupid it is and it won't mean a thing. I can live in a shit hole and it will be rad. I don't want nice things, I like just living and not thinking about if anything needs to be clean, or if I have to be careful. I can just be young and shitty and happy as fuck.

god it's great to be alive
takes the skin right off my hide
to think I'll have to give it all up someday

Sunday, April 19

the train is lost

the first time I saw the Darjeeling Limited I thought it was ok. didn't really like it that much compared to Wes Anderson's other films, but it was beautiful and all, whatever. it's a brother or a boy film, neither of which apply to me.
the second time I saw it I realized it's one of the funniest films I've ever seen. the humor is just so dry. every line is hilarious, I was cracking up the entire time. and still the most beautiful too.

we haven't located us yet.

Friday, April 17


something amazing happened last night. first of all, I went to see Dr Dog with Jeffrey at the Filmore, and it was incredible. the first band, The Golden Boots, was ok, I didn't really like them, but I didn't have to sit through their set, we got there late and checked out the poster room. The second band was The Cave Singers. they are my new favorite bang. they sounded so good, their performance was really tight. all I could think about while watching them was I hope I see them open at the Greek in five years, and play a sold out show to a sing along audience at the Great American in twenty. The lead singer is just so honest. they all feel the music their playing and pass the feeling on to anyone who listens. I bought their album, and a shirt. I can't remember the last time I bought a shirt at a concert, not to mention for a band I'd heard for the first time that night! the second Dr Dog came on I knew that this concert was going to be worth it. they owned every song, even songs I don't like I loved just becauase the were so into it, and so talented. by the end of the show everyone was screaming along and dancing around. I got up to the front row by the encore, which was five songs long. I think I lost my voice. and I think I'm in love with Zach Miller. it really just proved to me even more that to fully appriciate a band you have to see them live. music isn't little recorded snippets all spliced into one track, it's about playing together and investing yourself in it.
now, if you didn't think it could get more amazing, here it comes. on the bus ride back, we sat next to these two guys who had been standing infront of us for part of the show. we had smoked behind them, and I'd noticed that one of the guys had caught Toby's hat he threw out at the end of the show. they're names are Nick and Benny, and after about five or ten minutes of talking we found out they go to Santa Cruz, but are from Oakland. when they said they went to Oakland Tech, I told them my cousin Lucy went there. turns out, they're good friends of Lucy, and after another couple minutes, we figured out we met before. at her last birthday party I got a ride to bart in a two door car with eight people inside, and Nick was the boy who's lap I sat on! I couldn't believe it! I cannot wait to call Lucy and tell her. we figured out we have all these other connections from both living around here too, and I gave him my number so we can chill next time he's in town. I am so gald I went to this show.

what's the word that means more than a word
what's better than the best thing ever heard
I don't know how but I just got to tell you

Tuesday, April 14

the inbetween

I just ordered Honeybody Moonbee's new EP

you should too

(that's Emily, the girl with the ukulele Twigs and Branches has opened with a couple times)

Saturday, April 11


a customer at Cafeina said that Maria's matzo ball soup was better than Saul's. someone's gonna get shot.

Friday, April 10

yesterday, I was super cool. wednesday night I got drunk with Clementine and Jeffrey. I joked about how hard we were going to party after I finished printing, and when I got back half the bottle of whiskey I'd had in the fridge was gone. I don't do this often, but I just thought, fuck it, grabbed the bottle, and started chugging it down while Jeff and Clementine watched with mouths wide open. we stayed up until three in the morning. I got up and hung out with Clare and Cole in photo, and made some progress with my final that my teacher is psyched about. on my way back, AJ stopped me to talk about the 4D project, while Mark Johnson waited, that's right, stood there and waited to talk to me about the drawing homework, and how we both hadn't done it and probably weren't going to. during drawing, Colby rolled a spliff as usual and a couple of it smoked it during break on the bench outside our room. I showed Sierra, Lynnea and Rosealie the photos I printed from our camping trip, then listened to the moth podcast inbetween classes with Clementine, then said hi to Cosmo on my way to 4D. our project was due today, but our teacher was chill with us finishing our project over the weekend since we lost a day when our tape went missing, and we just watched other people's movies and first year practice presentations. at break I smoked Dean out which was hella chill. I watched the sound we added to our movie real fast and it's going to sound dank. then on the way back, I ran into the girl I have a crush on while she was on the phone, and she paused to say hi to me, fuck yeah. Lev is in town for passover, and he came with some of his friends and I gave him the bud he asked me to buy for him, and then we went over to Yosemite's and bought some more. after we smoked it we went to Christopher's burger and ate delicious, delicious food. I saw Ashley Carter on the way back and said hi. the end of my night was not so cool, after Lev and them left I decided to go to bed early and had to tell Megan and Angela to turn their music down while everyone was haging a party over there. I was just so tiered and had been talking to so many people all day that I didn't want to deal with having to seem cool infront of this other group of people who I think are super cool and intimidating. I probably would have fucked up and ruined my cool streak, so I didn't risk it. but I felt amazing this morning after getting enough sleep, so it was worth it. I got my job back at Cafeina and I'm working saturdays and picking up a shift today. tonight Lindsay and I are going to an A's game.
I haven't really been posting a lot, so if you're one of the few who read this, and the even fewer who care about my real life, here is a good day. let me tell you, they are not all this good, and there are a few that are better. but I felt really secure yesterday, even though everything that happened might have been mundane, which is sometimes the hardest thing for me. that feeling makes everything else worth it.

also, this is how drunk I was


stay awake and watch for the data
no small caterpillar, go congratulate her

Friday, April 3

go Iowa go

with scarves of red tied 'round their throats
to keep their little heads
from fallin' in the snow

Sunday, March 29

This Is Just To Say

This Is Just To Say
by William Carlos Williams

I have eaten
the plums
that were in
the icebox

and which
you were probably
for breakfast

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold

Monday, March 2

beaches and bridges

"If Quazar had sounded anything like Dame Satan, the San Francisco quartet that just played the Wednesday-night Americana Ramble at Marilyns on K, I might be translating dispatches from Zeti Reticuli right now. Ever heard music that makes you desperately try to remember if youd innocuously eaten a brownie earlier that could have been, ahem, herbally enhanced? Dame Satans music had that effect. The instrumentation was boilerplate Americana--acoustic guitars, banjos, resonator guitars, bass and maybe even a mandolin--but the execution was closer to chamber music meets jazz. The influences, among them British folk, English post-psychedelic blues rock, spare Delta blues and the sort of weird Americana the Grateful Dead sometimes hinted at, melded into an original whole whose presence was rather startling. The four members played off each other like ancient jazz bodhisattvas, and there was a conscious awareness and manipulation of the spaces between the notes, again more a jazz trait than an element common to more straightforward genres like bluegrass or country. The overall effect is easy to recall. Its like that time you got really buzzed and played guitar in the stairwell and sang, and you heard yourself sounding like something from another dimension."
-- Sacramento News and Views


big silver crow came here to show something inside of me lord only knows

Wednesday, February 25

Devo? nah it's all about Bowie

my new favorite thing to do to money

I think we were glad to see each other

Wednesday, February 11


so it begins...


I almost know all the words to Alice's Restaurant.

I mean I'm sitting here on the bench, I'm sitting here on the group w bench, cause you want to know if I'm moral enough to join the army, burn women, kids, houses and villages after being a litter bug?

Friday, February 6

do you dream in rgb cmyk?

my first color print
it makes me laugh. lazy fucks.

Wednesday, January 28

borrowed dogs

I do not hate my Intro to Modern Art class as much today as usual. while I was doing the ridiculous amount of homework we have for each class I found my new favorite painter, Egon Schiele. I was wikipediaing Expressionism and one of his paintings caught my eye. I've been looking at his work all afternoon and have fallen in love with it. the strong outlines, white backgrounds, broken figures and decrepit poses are extremely intriguing to me. I found through reading about him an essay about portraiture inspired by him written by Richard Avedon, my favorite photographer. it's called "Borrowed Dogs" and I read it and almost cried. I really understand why I love Richard Avedon, and portraiture in general now. this is what I love, and this is what I want to do.

death is a young poet’s romance, and an old man’s business

Tuesday, January 20

o! happy day

tears of joy, the broadest of smiles and a heart full of pride.

this is where my sister was

shoot the cannons, blow the horns

Wednesday, January 14

animals with eye patches


I'm the boy who loves to love you

Tuesday, January 6

"so hip"

Jason, Jeffrey, and their friend Tim picked me up from the airport today and we stopped at a Denny's on the way back. the woman who rang us up asked us if we were from England. we laughed and said, no we're from San Deigo, and asked her why she thought that. she said that we looked so hip she assumed we had to be foreign.

there's plenty of sunshine heading my way

Sunday, January 4


I always love it when people make their profile picture on facebook one of my photos, and I've noticed that a good amount of my friends have. it makes me proud.

I'm gonna love you till the day I was born

Saturday, January 3

apple blossom

I just got into The White Stripes. they're my new folk revival obsession. I know, I'm a little late. really I just started listening to them because they were quoted in an article I read about folk revival for my eight page research paper. (did I mention I wrote that paper in one seventeen hour night?) I'm mostly interested in their lyrics, which draw strongly from folk and blues roots. I love a twist on tradition.

Annie Lebovitz

I've been thinking
of a little place down by the lake
they got a dirty little road leading up to the house
I wonder how long it will take 'till we're alone
sitting on the front porch of that home
stomping our feet on the wooden boards
never gonna worry about locking the door

It might sound silly
for me to think childish thoughts like these
but I'm so tired of acting tough
and I'm gonna do what i please
let's get married
in a big cathedral by a priest
cause if I'm the man that you love the most
you could say i do at least

Friday, January 2

I got photoshop

and it feels so good

I want the moon's view

Thursday, January 1


use the school gym
go to yoga classes
sell all my old stuff
dress better
think before speaking

let's fall in love with fate

Thursday, December 25


"someone said, 'merry christmas jew' to me.
I told them, happy kwanza whitey."

Tuesday, December 23



we're sitting on a real celebration
thank heavens what a fine situation

Tuesday, December 9

by the way

I have a tattoo

I hope everyone likes it

fuck sacred rose

I'm just a gay jew. a stoned gay jew, in order of importance; depending on how you look at it.

"not only 'back where I come from,' but also 'where do we go from here?'"- Ben Botkin

Sunday, November 23

I like art school

my old homework: math

my new homework: mustaches

mustaches on strings are the finest of things

Saturday, November 22

let's pretend we don't exist

last night I saw Of Montreal. it was incredible. I danced the whole time, and was covered in sweat, very disoriented, and happy as a really really happy thing by the end. while walking out of the ball room, and man came up to me, put his hands on my shoulders, looked me in the eye and said, "thank you for being beautiful." before I could say anything he was gone, and I was speechless, my mouth open in astonishment and my eyes wide in surprise.

Eva, I'm sorry, but you will never have me
to me you're just some faggy girl, and
I need a lover with soul power
and you ain't got no soul power

Wednesday, November 19

devo has rocked for a long long time

sometimes I like to do this to my dollars

I hear there's this color called blue

give me sunshine

Wolf Parade's "I'll Believe In Anything" is one of the most romantic, gushy, corny, cliche love songs I've ever heard. and it's totally bad ass alternative indie punk rock.

Tuesday, November 18

she strikes again!


that one's for you James and Parker.

Tommy played piano like a kid out in the rain

Tuesday, November 11

you break my heart and put it back together again

Joni Mitchell is one of my favorite artsits. she always speaks to me, she's so sincere and genuine. there's no ego, just the truth and honesty. her lyrics are so perfect, general enough for everyone to understand, but specific and so well written that anyone can identify with them. anything from a love of California to feeling awkward and resenting people at a party. I think simplicity is so important, say as much as you can with as few elements as possible, straight forward, and easily accessible, but still subtle. she's so important to me because she can say things I can never even begin to try to articulate so nicely, and I can respect her because I know she's so good at it that many other people like me feel the same. for some people it's important to have faith in something to get them through the bad times, for me, I need some soul reaching and heart touching music and lyrics.

I told you when I met you I was crazy

Tuesday, November 4

I Voted

I voted.

and it was amazing.

and I'm stoned.

good day.

fuckin' yeah

Monday, November 3

sipping iced starlight

eating latkes early is like christmas in july for me

"'I don't care what they say about you in New York, you're cool in Berkeley'" - "a street angel black man on shattuck"- Jason

"I don't know about you, but when I go out, I go out to eat pie." -Julie

facebook: Xixi is free ice cream! (And that election thing too.)

you realize that don't you? we're going to say to our grandkids that the first election we ever voted in we voted in Obama.

oh you beautiful doll

Tuesday, October 28

you're gonna grow up someday to be at least five inches tall

I think I've finally got all my shit together, I've scanned everything and I'm now working on uploading all of it. I've been making so much art, but none of it is digital, which is really nice until I want to share it with people and have a very temperamental and low quality scanner. the band is going great. we've recorded a demo and are going to sell it at our little show in the faculty parking lot on thursday. I was supposed to get my tattoo yesterday, but the artist was sick and had to reschedual, so I got a nap. I haven't been sleeping very much the past month, and it really got to me last weekend. I'm going to stop smoking for the week so I can really get better (I've also been sick for over a month) and so Halloween will be OFF THE HOOK. I don't know what I'm doing yet, but I'm going to be Betty Boop. I saw Mirah and Matt Sheehy a while ago, and Sierra had a few extra tickets to Patti Smith and took me and Laura. it was amazing, she is so incredible, defintely one of the most powerful shows I've ever seen. in november I'm going to see She & Him and Of Montreal, which will also be great. Stuart sent me a postcard yesterday. it's one of his Holga prints, I thought I'd put it up here since he doesn't have a scanner. it's beautiful.

don't worry no no no life will get much easier
don't feel so low low low life will get much easier
real soon

Wednesday, October 15

Twigs and Branches

Dallin, Clare and I started a band called Twigs and Branches. we've all written a few songs (yes, even me!), and Dallin and I played at the Red is Blue open mic last week. the girl running it really liked us and had us play again at the end, and asked us if we'd be interesting in being hired to play more shows. last night I got an email:

"Red Is Blue is having a show tomorrow night. Wednesday October 15th at 10:30
in the Oakland, Campus.

Would you be interested in opening for this band called Twin Crystals along
with Honey Body Moonbee?

Amy told me you guys have a very great sound, would love to have you guys.


we're playing tonight at 10:30 in the B building on the Oakland campus! I'm so excited, I hope you can come.

it's all good she says to me
as we cheers and sip dandelion wine

Monday, October 13

eating stars XI

if I had a racehorse it would be named, Build Me Up I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter-cup.

Friday, October 10

hannah drew me

and made an etching

let us be lovers we'll marry our fortunes together
I've got some real estate here in my bag

Saturday, October 4

scum of the internet

a while ago, I made a little home video on my digital camera of my sister, Stuart and myself reenacting a raisin bran crunch commercial we thought was funny on tv. I posted it on you tube, for all of us to enjoy, and since then it has gotten over 12,000 views, and tons of comments about how bad it is, and how we are pathetic and have no life. excuse me, you're the one watching stupid you tube home videos and commenting on them.

today, I read this xkcd comic

thank you

a waltonism: excuse me, I don't think you know canvas bags like I know canvas bags

Sunday, September 28

take me down

I've been practicing, maybe you can tell?

I know you think you're the queen of the underground

Tuesday, September 23

of arts and crafts

this is the first print I've ever made myself, I love the darkroom. I just get it. I've done some amazing photo shoots the past few days I can't wait to develop. everyone here is such a great model, willing to do anything for art! I love this place, it makes me feel exceptional. I've made some of the best friends I've ever had, and have been creating art I never thought I could do. I got a job interview with a cafe I applied at, and I'm feeling really good about it. I've been going to lots of concerts, playing lots of music and discovering and bonding over tons of new artists. this place is the best thing that's ever happened to me, I've never felt so content.

we sailed away on a winter's day
with fate as malleable as clay

Monday, September 22


"my dad has a wine cellar"
"I have four different kinds of mustard"
"I could have been a professional pool player, but i decided not to be"
"I have the agility of a tiger, and the reflexes of a kitten."
"my dad made me jam, thanks dad"
"I want to have a party where all I play is Jungle Boogie on repeat for like four hours."

to be continued...

Monday, September 8

rock me

last night I went out into the halls with an accordion and the words to Wagon Wheel and it turned into a giant serenading party, and then jam session outside. I love this place.

the times they are a-changin'

Tuesday, September 2

eating stars X

Keli was just singing along to Lady Marmalade from the Moulin Rouge!

Sunday, August 24

sugar and spice

it feels like my life is finally starting over. it will be my life, not someone else's I'm stuck in. one that I chose, one that I want, one that I will thrive in.

she's got everything she needs, she's an artist, she don't look back.

Thursday, August 21

eating stars IX

the pterodactyl in gay jurassic park is like my three favortie things combined into one! because jeff goldblum would be in that movie!

now all I want to do is clean my bathroom
two minutes later
ok now I'm hungry and I want to clean my bathroom

"Emily! this is the last time I'm going to see you before we move, and the creepy eyebrow dance lady is going to be my only memory! stop it!" -Sophie

Wednesday, August 20

Sunday, August 17

untraditional is the new tradition

and these children that you spit on as they try to change their worlds are immune to your consultations, they're quite aware of what they're going through. don't tell them to grow up and out of it.

Friday, August 15

eating stars VIII

I saw Pineapple Express the other day at the 4:20 showing, rather stoned. it's the only way to do it. Lev, Anton and I had so many revelations and ideas afterward, but I don't feel like explaining them all right here. that's what I love about being stoned, I'm more interested in having original thoughts and figuring things out. sometimes my conclusions are silly, but a lot of the things I've realized I come back to later and integrate into the way I interpret the world.

"...and then we got some pizza" -Lev

love's such an old fashion word

I love it when you can interpret songs to the point where it feels like they were written about you. I do that a lot, it makes me feel better because the song writers are always much better than I am at explaining myself and my thoughts and feelings.

I just feel like sharing some love and beauty. I could use some and I'm sure you could too. who ever you are.

my hopes and dreams, my past present and future, five photographs.

all you need is love